"You like movies because you're one of life's great watchers."

So says Woody Allen's irked, soon-to-be-ex-wife in Play It Again, Sam, obviously having had enough of his sedentary lifestyle. Hmm, I think she would have left me, too.

But, hey, do a female's myriad charms really stack up against the corny delights of Cocktail, the vicious cynicism of The Sweet Smell of Success, the dark ferocity of The Thing, the fantastic imagination of Westworld, the perverted milieu of Happiness or the heartbreak of Kes?

For these are just some of the films covered in the fifth part of this lewd, politically incorrect guide to the treasures of twentieth century cinema. Author Dave Franklin also throws in a bevy of bitches, the worst-ever holidays and a tribute to old men feasting on teenage flesh.